00: Prologue: A Very Good Day

Russ’s version ->

<7/30/2095 12:00:00 AM> T minus two days

The sergeant picked up his com, “Think we might have some business, Charlie.”
“Good,” Charlie said, “This has been a boring morning, so far. What’s up?”
“I’ve got a boy, well into puberty, looking nervous. He’s been back and forth in front of our office several times already and visited the database… twice.”
“No Mommy and Daddy?” Charlie asked with a chuckle.
“Not this one. I’ve seen his type before. Odds are his parents are clueless. Gotta go, here he comes. . .”
The door opened and the young man walked in, closing the door carefully behind him and standing in front of it, as far from the desk as you could get. If the sergeant hadn’t had his smile plastered to his face he would have laughed out loud at the contrast between this timid, thin young man and the statuesque blond giant, posing with a laser gun in his hand and a comet over his shoulder, on the CF poster behind him.
“I… I’d like to sign up,” the young man said, finally coming quickly to the counter, looking almost furtive, but determined.
“Very good, sir,” the sergeant said easily, rising quickly from his chair and pushing the button in front of him which silvered the glass and locked the door. “I will lock the door while we complete our business. Standard procedure, you understand. Come right over here and put your hand on the scanner, please.” He didn’t usually lock the door, actually; not at this stage of the process. But this one looked so nervous the sergeant was afraid someone else coming in might just spook him.
The young man, with one last look over his shoulder, came over and put his right hand on the glowing plate on the desk, which beeped and turned green. “Very good sir,” the sergeant said, when the new recruits identity confirmation came up on his comp. “Now, if would look right into the camera here and repeat after me, ‘I… then say your name sir… do hereby freely and without reservation join the Colonization force. ‘”
The young man repeated the words, and the sergeant relaxed, smiled, and said, “Excellent, sir. A couple of questions, and then we can get on to the physical. Do you have a partenere, sir?”
“No, no partenere. I haven’t… no, no partenere.”
“Ah, that is a shame,” the sergeant said, sighing to himself at the loss of the bonus that a partner meant for him. He had worked hard to wrangle himself this recruiting job and the bonuses that came with it, and he hated each missed opportunity.
“Will you be joining for five years, ten years, or life, sir?” He asked, and held his breath. The situation seemed obvious enough, but you never could be sure. Perhaps the boy was running from his parents, or a young lady instead of…
“Life,” the boy said, and the sergeant grinned: Life was as good as a partenere, as far as his bonus went. Although, of course, life and a partenere, or, better yet, with children, each bringing him a bonus! Those were the best and, quite frankly, the routine. But, still, each little bit counted toward the day, hopefully not long away now, when he could retire.
“Excellent, sir. And who do you want to get your exemption, and your bonus?” The young man stammered out several names and the sergeant patiently typed them in and then said, “There, that is all the questions I have for you. Now if you will just take your clothes off and step into that door there.”
The sergeant loved this part. His own modesty had been burnt away first by his boot camp experience and then by several years in this job but New Texas was a fairly modest society and so, even though the boy should have known that this was the routine, he blushed and fumbled with his buttons, glancing back several times at the silvered window. It was always funny to watch but this time, with a boy this shy, it was truly hilarious. Accustomed to the diplomacy he needed for his job, though, the recruiting sergeant just smiled serenely through the process. Eventually the last bit of clothing had dropped to the floor and the naked lad turned away from the sergeant and toward the door to the exam room. “Just step right inside, sir,” the sergeant encouraged him, wondering whether to unlock the door and unsilver the window. That would get him moving. “The medic is waiting for you.”
“What about my clothes and things?” the boy asked, nervously, glancing back and forth between the room beyond and the room he was leaving.
“Don’t worry about them, sir,” the sergeant said, coming forward. “I will take care of them.”
He would, too, he said to himself as the boy finally opened the door and he Charlie’s greeting and instructions starting. The sergeant picked the clothes up and pulled everything out of the pockets. The cash he put in his pocket, something he only got to do when the kid came without parents. He stared at the credit card but, since that big scandal over in Dallas, draining that would be too risky. He had the kids parents address, so he addressed an envelope to them and put the card in it. He was just turning to put the boy’s clothes into a donation box he kept behind the counter just for this when his communication bell rang. It was Charlie, the Colonization Force crew in the next room. The boy was obviously all packaged up already.
“What was that about?” George asked, as the sergeant answered. “He’s nervous as a cat! And you said he came in alone?”
“Yep,” the sergeant said.
“But no Mommy or Daddy… even unpartnered?”
“Happens sometimes,” the sergeant said. “I’ve seen his type before.”
“Oh?”
“Yup,” the sergeant said, pulling out his book reader again and sitting back, watching the crowd, hopefully. “You see…”
He broke off as the door opened, to reveal a shy young couple, and what were obviously both sets of parents. “Gotta call you back, Charlie,” he said, hastily, into his com. “Good morning,” he said, coming out from behind the counter to shake the fathers’ hands, “How can I help you…?”

Russ’s version ->

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About Von

Von is a father of six, husband of one, former missionary linguist, former school teacher, and current LVN and EMT. He lives with his family on a very small farm-ish-thing in Texas with a calf (named ‘Chuck’, if you get the point), ducks, chickens, rabbits, dogs, cats, two piglets, pecan trees and a garden. Vaughn loves to write; science fiction, fantasy, theology… Von’s religion informs his writing in many ways; so you might want to know that Von is a Reformed Baptist, Theonomist, Full Quiver, Homeschooler… and odd in many other ways.

6 thoughts on “00: Prologue: A Very Good Day

  1. Von Post author

    Some story notes:
    Tensions: A prolog in fantasy sci-fi is supposed to start the tensions and mystery. Here I am trying to get the readers wondering about what k ind of culture this is, what the boy has volunteered to do, and why it is so odd that he did it ‘today’. And why did he do it today?

    Story points: Introduce the culture, introduce Andrew. The others are unimportant except as archetypes.

    Things I want to improve:

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  2. Randy

    “who do you want to get your exemption” sounds ominous. Implies that citizens can sometimes be conscripted into the Colonization Force, but if one person volunteers, one or more of his friends get exempted from conscription. Just a guess, but that’s what it sounds like.
    “and your bonus” is even scarier! Implies (along with the subsequent raping of his finances) that he ‘gets’ a bonus for signing up, but doesn’t really get it himself. It goes to a beneficiary he names, as if he were dying. It’s a last will and testament kind of thing. Only not “if/when you die” but rather “since you are effectively dying”.

    Also, the “taking care” of his clothes was a smooth lie. I hate it. (Maybe I’m supposed to.) The taking of his bank money was too easy. Either the banks are under the military authority anyway, or the scanning of the kid’s hand counts as the kid authorizing the subsequent swipe. It shouldn’t be that easy to take a person’s net worth.

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  3. Von Post author

    Good point on the credit card, I’ve fixed that and will post the new version soon.

    You’re not so much supposed to hate the sergeant as see him of a type. Perhaps I have read too much historical fiction of the Napoleonic era, as this is supposed to be reflective of that time.

    Thanks for the comments, Randy.

    Reply
  4. Randy

    I also wonder about any creditors of the poor kid having a more legitimate claim on his funds than this sergeant. If any have political connections, sarge could be in trouble for looting what rightfully belongs to another, and I don’t mean the kid, but those who have a lien on his ‘estate’. It’s one thing to “look through his pockets for loose change” (when he’s more than “mostly dead”), and quite another to steal from powerful institutions.

    Again, moot, if he’s part of the absolutely dominant institution and this is standard practice. Just letting you know what his actions imply about this society.

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